How To Build Confidence: The 9 Steps That Work

Confidence is an elusive state of mind that everyone likes to possess. It isn’t something you’re born with, but it is learnable. Not everyone believes in or garners the power of self-confidence. If you are wondering how to build confidence, you are at the right place.

Building your confidence doesn’t happen overnight. Here’s what you need to do:

  • Plan and Prepare
  • Meet Your Goals
  • Observe Your Growth
  • Follow Through
  • Be Courageous
  • Positive Thought
  • Dress the Part
  • Learn How to Interact
  • Stand Up for What’s Right
man jumping comfort zone to success drawing on chalk board

If you see someone brimming with self-confidence, they probably have worked on it for ages. It is quite difficult to build confidence in a world that is always looking to bring you down. Start with silencing the inner critic who looks for every chance to tell that you are not good enough.

The Steps To Building Your Confidence

Planning and Preparation

Not everyone is confident to handle new or difficult situations. So, what if you are afraid? The key to building confidence is to practice and practice. Practice always trumps natural aptitude. Just assume that you are not optimistic about the interview you are about to attend. Instead of being overwhelmed, you can take control of the situation and prepare for it. List down everything you need to overcome your fear. Practice for your interview. Have backup plans for when something goes wrong.

Meet Your Goals

The simple way to boost your morale is to meet your goals. Small or big, do not underestimate what a simple achievement could do. Plan your day to day goals and take steps to meet them. If your everyday goals are met, the chances are that you are on the right track to meet the long-term goals. Changes do not happen overnight. But every small step in the right direction takes you closer to the goal.

Observe Your Growth

Ensure that you track your growth in every goal. This helps you move forward without the fear of stagnation. If you do not see progress, try quantifying every step that you take. This enables you to stay on the path even if you lack confidence. Your self-esteem will grow as you see the growth. Results are not significant, at least not as much as the process.

Follow Through

Part of the problem with a lack of confidence is that you fail to put your words into action. To build your confidence, follow through with every decision and promise that you make. Not only would you respect yourself but also gain appreciation from your peers. Start backing your words with actions. Once you start to believe in yourself, the rest comes easy. It also takes you a long way to achieve your goals.

Be Courageous

It is tough to be courageous when you lack self-confidence. You fear failure, and that is your biggest enemy. Your dreams and goals seem unachievable, overwhelming you and crippling you. At this moment, look into yourself, muster courage and keep moving. Being self-confident is not about being fearless; it’s about facing your fears and keep moving. Put aside your doubts and move forward, one step at a time.

lion sitting a rock on a windy day

Positive Thoughts

Positive thinking plays a crucial part in your confidence. Your thoughts and ideas push you back into what you think is your comfort zone. In truth, it is your lack of confidence that holds you back. Reset your thinking and give yourself leeway. Do not be too critical of yourself. If you feel the negative thoughts and feelings, take control, stop and start thinking positive thoughts about yourself. Think about success. Once this habit sets in, you will start believing in yourself.

How To Be A (Confident) Man

Figuring out who you are, your strengths, and your beliefs go a long way into building confidence. While it seems inconspicuous in this day and age, I’ve also been asked, “How to be a man?”. Here’s are a few ways to guide you on the path.

Dress the Part

The first and foremost thing about being a ladies man is dressing for the part. You do not want to attend a concert or a music festival in a suit and tie. Ripped jeans and a casual t-shirt fits right in there. However, for a party, you would look out of place in the same outfit. Dress to suit your tastes but also keep the audience in mind. Make sure you dress for success.

happy couple man carrying woman on his back

Learn How to Interact

A man who’s easy-going has manners and packs confidence, will shine anywhere he goes. His charm will attract women and men to his side without having to work for it. But that’s is not enough; you need to interact in ways to maintain the attraction. Let go of your ego and share your stage with women if needed. This shows your confidence in yourself and also your maturity. Women are more attracted to men, who do not try to prove themselves in every turn.

Stand Up for the Right Thing

Above all, stand by your beliefs and do the right thing, even it will cause disagreement. Everyone is entitled to their ideals, but you also have the freedom to express your own. If you find your friend or colleague say something derogatory, have the courage and tell them they are wrong. Give them reasons why they should not make such a statement. Use facts, and do not let emotions cloud your judgment. Be aware of who you are and what you stand for. But, be open to change.


For someone who lacks self-esteem, being confident may look unattainable. But it isn’t. With practice, you can gain confidence; But it requires you to change your route and walk the difficult path. Apart from the usual goal setting and meeting goals, you also need to dress for the part. Being confident is also about interaction and being able to make your statement. And after everything, stop and take stock of everything in your life. Do you have time for your passions? A simple and enriching hobby can make all the difference in your confidence.

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